Ep. 67 | 2 Bears, 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
1:36:12
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Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer start off this episode of 2 Bears, 1 Cave by discussing the time Bert's spent in Rome. They also talk about how fast Bert is in the bedroom, shooting their Super Bowl commercials, Marilyn Manson's abuse accusations, Dustin Diamond's passing, and their most extreme heckler stories.
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  • yetipd100
    yetipd100

    Hey Bert you should be more inclusive to conservatives. They still can be your fan

  • Noah Weisz
    Noah Weisz

    Does anyone know what the history podcast is called?

  • Blake Guzman
    Blake Guzman

    Thank you for that last segment. More fail stories please!

  • Fiberton
    Fiberton

    AOC was not at the Capitol. She was at a office building a 1/4 mile away as a crow fly's. Much farther by foot. No one was at her building. Crazy that people stormed the Capitol but she is being hyperbolic.

  • John Marino
    John Marino

    What the fuck I was born in bryn mar hospital too

  • MrPierreBoch
    MrPierreBoch

    Heh this Bart guy is really funny

  • Ethan S.
    Ethan S.

    If you actually believe bert’s story at the end. You’re an idiot.

  • Orange Surfer
    Orange Surfer

    Bert is so fucking stupid funny ,omfg .

  • Andrew Justus
    Andrew Justus

    Tom I went and saw you a few years ago in Springfield Missouri and there was a “Karen” in the audience and she was disruptive throughout your whole set and I’m honestly sad you didn’t address it

  • Anthony Radosti
    Anthony Radosti

    Hey tommy dip shit you’re taking too many edibles too late. Take fast acting edibles that act within 20 minutes, this limits the tolerance rising.

  • Daniel
    Daniel

    I'm sure "gangbangers" were at the show Bert....

  • John McClane
    John McClane

    1:03:05 the joey diaz 1000mg edible guide

  • Gonzo Got Games
    Gonzo Got Games

    Bert Reminds me of Risitas on IRbin. Please search it up! Respectfully.

  • Blake Harrison
    Blake Harrison

    Does Bert not know Life According to Jimmy

  • Blake Harrison
    Blake Harrison

    I grew up an Alabama fan but Bo Jackson is a freak of nature, truly unreal talent

  • JBreezy87
    JBreezy87

    Nobody was gonna kill AOC and fyi her story was full of shit.

    • Hayden Prunest
      Hayden Prunest

      that pissed me off so much.

  • Zachary Murray
    Zachary Murray

    Derran brown did it where he got a studio audience to vote to kill someone using mob mentality

  • Special Officer Doofy
    Special Officer Doofy

    2 of the least “funny” “comics” out there. Seriously this is a fuckin disgrace

  • Alex C
    Alex C

    Bruce “I just discovered self-control” Kirchner

  • Steven Phillips
    Steven Phillips

    AOC wasn't even in the same building when that shit went down.

  • brokenathkete07
    brokenathkete07

    Sapp ran a 4.3

    • brokenathkete07
      brokenathkete07

      Lied. 4.69

  • allyson vastano
    allyson vastano

    The show exists it was called boiling point

  • Corey Goodin
    Corey Goodin

    Hershel Walker fought a pro MMA fight when he was like 50 and he had a 6 pack.

  • Charlie Nice
    Charlie Nice

    You gotta watch the real bros of Simi Valley

  • Shardhoney
    Shardhoney

    "AOC could have gotten killed" ok but she wasnt even at the capitol she was in her office playing soldier lol ohh Bert

  • mark smith
    mark smith

    The worst thing about cancel culture? Seeing 2 grown men held by their balls forced to sing falsetto

  • Finstor
    Finstor

    Buck O'neil was one of the greatest guys to listen to, talking baseball.

  • somecsguy
    somecsguy

    That lump under the armpit comment was almost definitely nick dipaolo. Saw him use it at the Cellar once

  • john asshat
    john asshat

    MTVs boiling points is very similar to the tv idea Bert described.

  • Malcolm Exxx
    Malcolm Exxx

    “I gotta be the guy that brings you to your lowest place.” what lmao.

  • Hejcior
    Hejcior

    42:00 wonder how many times Tim slipped and said "shit more" while reading that commercial.

  • Adam Groves
    Adam Groves

    Tom keeps bert around for comic relief

  • Matt McLellan
    Matt McLellan

    I really do wanna see Bruce and Tom do crack. I can’t even begin to imagine Bart even more talkative!

  • Nerdvana North
    Nerdvana North

    Bert is slippin

  • smokinone951
    smokinone951

    AOC would not have been killed. lmfao, she wasnt even there, she had been evacuated already. shes already been called out on it,

  • Mr Poop
    Mr Poop

    5 people died that day? Have you guys done ANY independent research? 🐑 Honestly though, what did I expect? Hey, how's LA?

  • 19Burgandy
    19Burgandy

    Bert is such typical judgmental liberal. "He huts so he must have bad political views..... Always attacking are fucking right to bear arms how we fuckingn became a independent country

  • 19Burgandy
    19Burgandy

    Bert can be a little pussy when it comes to saying certain things.... Only gives power to ppl that wana cancell anyone for anything so they get s power trip and maybe their name gets mentioned once.........

  • Bobo The Clown
    Bobo The Clown

    Boiling point was on MTV

  • Aaron Whitesel
    Aaron Whitesel

    Bert I would like to help you with your road rage. As someone who suffers from a similar affliction and has figured out how to cope with it I feel as though I may have some insight for you. A few tiny changes could impact your daily travels for the rest of your life.

  • Exnier
    Exnier

    When Bert pauses and stares blankly before he talks you know it’s “uh-hundred” percent a made up story.

  • Brandon Calder
    Brandon Calder

    Alcohol really helps your body respond well to exercise haha

  • Lighthouse094
    Lighthouse094

    C'mon fellas, way to ostracize more of your fan base. "Sneaky conservative" he hints so his politics must be out there. Bart you keep doing this, "I never talk about politics"and then you underhandedly cut down conservatives. Maybe take a look at politics from more than Facebook and the other people in California. Most of your fan base isn't in blatant liberal states. Smh

  • Chano
    Chano

    I used to look forward to this podcast

  • Timewaits4no1
    Timewaits4no1

    🐦y is so beautifully full of $hit. It's actually amazing. I mean who else justifies taking multiple shots of whisky @ 6am as "celebrating my power!"

  • Jason Machado
    Jason Machado

    Don’t believe Bert was in the right about that driving incident, don’t usually believe anything he says tbh lol

  • anthony petty
    anthony petty

    " I have to be the guy to take you to your lowest place"...every guys dream, lol

  • Jake Romanciwicz
    Jake Romanciwicz

    Playing with the turd 🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • Cj Savvage
    Cj Savvage

    These two are the heaviest lightweights ive ever seen ... i eat 1000mg of thc no problem. And as far as Xanax goes well half a mg seems very low.. lol

    • Taylor Goetz
      Taylor Goetz

      GAUZZZZ

  • Shaun Morris
    Shaun Morris

    Heard Louisville, got excited. Story continued, less excited.

  • Hermes Sanchez
    Hermes Sanchez

    I ran 6 miles is blane kristna's speak for walked from the toilet to the coich. No way he's running even 2 miles a day

  • Ryan Jones
    Ryan Jones

    The difference with the rage situation was you had the wherewithal to stfu and not get yourself caught up in some bs. People who don’t must reap what they sow.

  • Ryan Jones
    Ryan Jones

    STOP COMPARING XANAX AND EDIBLE BRUCE. Xanax fucks your body up

  • Ryan Jones
    Ryan Jones

    50mg would kill Brent, uh-oh

  • Ryan Jones
    Ryan Jones

    “The key is the smoke weed all the time” -Tommy Amen brother!

  • Still squeezin'
    Still squeezin'

    Turns out Bruce Kreischner does not only smell bad and makes love to dogs, he also can't let go of the racism.

  • Chris Dennis
    Chris Dennis

    It's like Burt only knows one word for when he likes something... obsessed. lol we'll have to come up with a new disorder for him...OOD. Obsessive Obsessed Disorder lol

    • Paul LeBon
      Paul LeBon

      *crickets*

  • Joe Jim
    Joe Jim

    irbin.info/loft/fy-lm-h-y/Z7KJaanJ2m-rrIM.html

  • The Postman
    The Postman

    Aoc wasn't in the building. She fabricated her story. Tim Pool breaks it down really well

  • Steven Asplund
    Steven Asplund

    Bob interrupted ted’s story as soon as it was getting good 😢

  • Jamie Lertoria
    Jamie Lertoria

    Bert "I had a boyfriend" Kreischer.

  • R S.A
    R S.A

    I might be super late.. But wtf happened to the opening theme song with the bear? It was really good. Did the guy that mixed it pull some copyright shit and the bears had to nix it from their episodes?

  • DM R
    DM R

    The storming the capitol was a complete joke with staged photo ops. There were four deaths, none of them related to the protesters' "violence". An obvious psyop. Can't even believe the legitimacy of those supposed deaths. Dum dum Tom

  • Paul Salibe Jr.
    Paul Salibe Jr.

    AOC was not gonna get killed nor was she close to being killed. Jesus Christ

  • Jack Jack
    Jack Jack

    Hey Tom, can you replace Bert with Josh Potter. Bert is annoying as hell. Seems like he shovels down adderall and bitches about rolling on molly too much.

  • Craig Brinkman
    Craig Brinkman

    You don't want crack you want freebase

  • Spencer Rugg
    Spencer Rugg

    I wish it wasnt so obvious that they only listen to CNN

    • Paul LeBon
      Paul LeBon

      I'm glad that it's obvious that they have a healthy contempt for Fox "News."

  • Jessy John Tavares
    Jessy John Tavares

    Okay like I ain't trying to flex. But I'm a Canadian bong smoker 😂😂 and like 100 milligrams is basically what I'll do every night. 100 mg Jessy every night no devil seen. Joey Diaz is the only comic I would be scared to do edibles with. It's just weird to hear people who aren't Canadian talk about their dosage, and I'm like whoa. We use cannabis alot up here if 100 ain't shit for me g

  • Dillon Mann
    Dillon Mann

    Almost like "at da time Tommy" they did not get the same as the other guys

  • pyro buscus
    pyro buscus

    hey, no. the people who caused violence in the capital were paid to do so. manufactured opposition. there were antifa members masquerading as Trumpers. in addition, trump said peacefully make your voices heard. he was aquited for incitement. because he didn't incite.

  • Dillon Mann
    Dillon Mann

    What's up with screech dieing?

  • Dillon Mann
    Dillon Mann

    So in episode 6 of the new Walker Texas Ranger TV show there's a character in the show that actually uses the term "nightmeer"

  • deziree lynn
    deziree lynn

    smh bert... and right before persian new year😤

  • Julie Burgoni
    Julie Burgoni

    Livestream was a blast!

  • Anthony Jackson
    Anthony Jackson

    How do you go from talking about Nikki Glazer to five minutes later saying you didn’t no any girl that loves anal. When every podcast she’s on, 3 podcasts eps between the two of you, she talks about her love of anal. And how she prefers it.

  • Teeguner -
    Teeguner -

    shity people stories should be a segment on this show I really enjoyed it.

  • Jamie Sucie
    Jamie Sucie

    LOL! Working out has nothing to do with a person not getting COVID. Another great Bertism

  • William Luca
    William Luca

    1:15:55 2 Bears 1 Cave historical moment! Tim told an interesting story without being cut off by Brent!

  • gorillawarfair
    gorillawarfair

    Dustin diamond got kinda screwed by saved by the bell. He carried that show but was only remembered as the jokey side character.

  • Simon Malmgren
    Simon Malmgren

    was the guy with the bachelorett party Andrew Santino ? i could see him saying that

  • Brandon Davis
    Brandon Davis

    If Bret smokes crack Tim wont get a word in

  • Brien Davis
    Brien Davis

    These two sound so stupid talking about aoc she wasnt even in the building. Her story was proven false. The fuckin r words are so dumb sometimes

  • Todd Strong
    Todd Strong

    Tom is quite good at plugging the product. That was my highlight of the podcast

  • rick hietala
    rick hietala

    He stole the nightmere bit from William Montgomery

  • Itachi Tsukuyomi DCUO
    Itachi Tsukuyomi DCUO

    Love how the SECOND Bret starts digging a hole for himself Tom hands him two more shovels and a miners helmet with a little light on it

    • Vinx-Splats
      Vinx-Splats

      lmaooo frr

    • Dom Velasquez
      Dom Velasquez

      I didn’t know why I loved these 2 so much... until I read this

    • James Masuda
      James Masuda

      This describes their friendship dynamic to a T

  • Josh Harris
    Josh Harris

    GUYS I just heard another poor schmuck out here saying nightmeere AND it is in Episode 6 of Wanda Vision at 7 minutes 39 seconds SOMEONE PLEASE VERIFY this is driving me crazy now damn you Brent Bwahahaha

  • Terrible Gamers
    Terrible Gamers

    Fuck saved by the bell, screech was the only good thing about that show

  • Sean Li
    Sean Li

    The lowly refrigerator acromegaly order because prison plausibly pat mid a quizzical asparagus. woebegone, moaning spear

  • Matt D
    Matt D

    Watch "the people's mayor" it's the funniest shit I've ever seen tom do

  • Stefan Schulz
    Stefan Schulz

    Watching Bruce tip toe around potentially getting himself canceled in this podcast was like watching a drunk walrus ride a unicycle.

  • Dave c
    Dave c

    Michael Jordan....

  • J Keid
    J Keid

    1:26:40

  • Ogbose49
    Ogbose49

    Deion was track fast also. Don't forget about Hershal Walker.

  • hatchbackhound
    hatchbackhound

    We all know Bert and Tom can drink but. I have yet to hear about them drinking things out of their wheelhouse. Fancy wiskey, Fernet, Chartreuse, Absinthe...

  • Brian Maisch
    Brian Maisch

    Bert is a bad person. He thinks it is funny to see if he can drive home before his Xanax impairs him. I am glad he didn't kill anyone that day.

  • Crow47
    Crow47

    "Is tHeRe cOrOnA iN it??" -Bruce Kersher

  • Michael Goodrich
    Michael Goodrich

    Put a 50 rock in a blunt. That is better then just crack.

  • jack danielson
    jack danielson

    anyone watching wandavision, in episode 6 about early in the episode one of agents clearly says ' then this nightmere will end.' I had to watch it several times to make sure, but brent isnt the only wan. I thought crystals was crazy.

  • Jason Landers
    Jason Landers

    For someone who drinks that much Bert should 100% not start weed... Drinking an smoking never goes well an it's gonna put him off

  • Jasper Jansen
    Jasper Jansen

    no bert, no one sounds like that... pigs do though